My American Boy 2

We meet again.  You asked me to forgive you and I told you, “You do not have to.”  Two years and some more had passed since the call, since the time I felt most scared.  I already understood why.  You do not have to explain anything.

But you insisted and said, “I just have to, I have been carrying this for a long time and I am so sorry for shutting you out of my life.”  Truth was you shut everyone out of your life.

Starbucks Coffee.

February 22, 2011.  The first time I saw you again after two years.  I didn't know what to feel, what to say, but I wanted to see you.  So I picked you up from your cousins’ house.  First thing you said to me, “You look great.”  And I replied, “I even look prettier on better days.”

We headed to Starbucks so we can have that chance to talk.  All through the hour you asked for forgiveness.  I did not think that was necessary for I never hated you, I understood you.  You recounted what happened the day after you brought me to LAX and I told you just the same what I had underwent during those times.

“It was painful because I was helpless...  I was so far away and I can not do anything...  I so wanted to be with you during those times...” These were my words to you and you understood me too.

So you asked me if I am seeing someone and I said, “I was.”  “Was he an asshole that is why you are no longer seeing him?”  Without batting an eyelash I quipped, “Yes.”

“Are we friends?” you asked.  “Of course we are,” I replied.  “So you will see me when I come over to visit Manila and you will come visit me when you are in LA?”  “Yes …. Unless I am seeing someone during that time …”  “ Oh, when there is somebody to kick my ass ..” you replied and smiled.

Since we just secretly saw each other, I had to bring you back to your cousins’ place back so soon.  It was nearly 12 midnight.  We walked to the truck, hand in hand.  You stopped and hugged me and kissed me.  My heart wanted to scream, I miss you so much !, but I kept my silence for we agreed to be just friends and I am happy with that.

Again, we kissed each other and said good night.

Galileo Wines / Lodge / Eastwood City.

February 28, 2011.  We had another chance to see each other.  I fixed my sked so I can leave work early and have dinner with you.  Anxious, but excited I was.

This time I picked you up from another cousins’ house.  Your mom and Ash were there too and I insisted to say hi to them.  It was heartwarming to see your mom again, also meeting some of your other relatives.  (I love your mom, please tell her that when you have a chance to.)

You wanted something Italian and I had a place in mind.  I took you to Galileo Wines, a hole in the wall of Mandaluyong City.  We had bread and pate, antipasti, pasta and wine.  I saw that you enjoyed my choice for dinner. 

We talked, laughed and talked some more ….

You said you were not here to rekindle anything as we are better to be just friends.  Our distance was our challenge and you do not want me to give up my life here in Manila.  I did not argue with that, for I know it was true.  Being together is a big challenge for both of us… although my heart would like to say, there is a way… it’s just that I do not know how … yet.

We still had time to spare.  All you wanted was just to be together and quietly spend time with each other.  You suggested lounging and we did.

It was so sweet of you to be my Menandro, switching channels when the remote won’t work.  Like before, you wanted to make my life easy for me.  Even the smallest of chores, you would do it for me.  Of course I had my own way of being sweet too.

The sound of the alarm made us laugh our hearts out.  I have not laughed that way in a long time.  It was a classic moment for us.

You hugged me and carried me in your arms, this was one thing I so liked you doing to me.  “Really?” you asked surprisingly and I said “yes,”  and you hugged me even tighter and did not let go.  Again, you would do little and big things to make me happy.

On the way back, your brother called and asked you to join him and some other friends at Eastwood.  I drove you there to meet up with them.  You held my hand as I drove.

They were having some beer and you had your share too, while I drank my hot calamansi juice. Your kuya did not allow me to have alcohol as I was kinda sick already and my resistance was low.  That was sweet of him too.

We chatted with the group, my hand was in yours all the time.  I was surprised that you did this in front of your kuya and the group.  We appeared to be a couple, more than just friends.  But I did not mind at all.

It was nearly 2am and I had to go home. I said goodbye to the group and you brought me to my car.  In the parking lot, again we hugged and kissed each other.  Shall we see each other again? No one knows … maybe in 2 years time again? I don’t really know.

I just know that I was very happy to see you.  No broken promises, only happy memories.